God creates us to be His friends
By Msgr. John Wynand Katende
Posted on: Friday, 14th November 2025
On the occasion of celebrating the 45th anniversary of my priestly ordination (2nd November 1980), God granted me the grace to reflect on Jesus’ declaration to His disciples: “You are my friends” (John 15:14). I felt extremely humbled and blessed to be a friend of God; in spite of my being a mere human and sinner!
The reflection reminded me that God, in the first place, created me in His image and likeness, to be His friend, not a slave. He, likewise, deliberately chose me to be His beloved priest; despite my unworthiness (John 15:16). His has helped me to carry the priestly burden for the last 45 years.
I have also come to realize that friendship with God includes all people; leading to a wider and wider circle of friends. In that respect, I celebrated the accompaniment of so many friends Jesus has given me, along the way.
It has been observed that in the world in which we live, there is a great deal of loneliness. Psychologists sometimes call it “alienation,. And although there may be a lot of “friending” on social media, many of us lack relationships that are up-close and personal; that let us know and love the other in a deeper way and be loved in return. This can lead to all kinds of problems: depression, anger and anxiety,
Friendships, are, hence, extremely valuable in life. They enable us to share love and life with others. After God had created Adam, He observed that it was not good for man to be alone. He created Eve to be a friend, companion and helpmate.
St. Thomas Aquinas says, friendship means a love that can be seen and felt; it is perceptible. For a true and firm friendship the friends need a mutual love for each other. Friendships are relationships of openness. Openness creates connection. We can be open, even about our weaknesses and our failings, because we know that we are always loved and accepted. Friends for a lifetime are the type of friends that hang on to us no matter what storm, disappointment or disruption comes along. They offer forgiveness, unconditional love, support, and space. They do not own or control us.
Jesus provides the perfect model of what a loving, virtuous friend looks like. He started His ministry and friendship with His twelve disciples. He went on to express deep, sacrificial love for all people in His life and death, and set the example for us to follow (John 15:13). In this act, Jesus sanctifies human friendships and makes them a fit vehicle for expressing the friendship of God.
John the Apostle, asserted that he was the “Beloved Disciple” (John 13:23). It may not have been an expression of pride, but of great humility. He was given the grace to steadily and progressively internalize his Master’s friendship. While other disciples fled when Jesus was arrested, John remained steadfast, and witnessed the sacrificial death of his Master. His gospel is a clear testimony of God’s love/friendship.
In order to reciprocate His friendship, Jesus commands us to: “Love God with your heart, soul, mind and strength; and love your neighbor as yourself” (John 13:34). He will give us both the graces and the persons we are to love as He loves them.
Love is used in this context as an analogy of friendship. It is the deliberate act of valuing someone more than you value yourself. Love is a deliberate and committed act of kindness, of caring for, and listening to another, wanting another to be happy, healthy, successful and fulfilled. In that respect, all of us could refer to ourselves as the disciple whom Jesus loves.
I like to close this reflection with the message Pope Leo XIV, while celebrating the Jubilee for Vocations, with thousands of priests and seminarians from across the world on 17th July 2025: "This friendship with Christ is the spiritual foundation of ordained ministry, the meaning of our celibacy and the energy of the ecclesial service to which we dedicate our lives. It sustains us in times of trial and enables us to renew each day the 'yes' uttered at the beginning of our vocation."